I didnt post yesterday; Ive GOT to get better at this....
Anywho. Today has been one of the most (excuse my language) HELLACIOUS days Ive had in a long time. For one, I did NOT sleep good at all last night. By the time my alarm went off, I was finally ready for bed. But my job awaited. Then, I am not feeling good :( I think the crud Matt had is finally catching up with me. Then comes the worse part.
I get on facebook, the evil, evil, facebook. I saw pregnancy announcement #1. It was from someone who wasnt even "trying" and who just got married less than a year ago..... Ok. Cool. No biggie. Except obviously, she didnt have to try to hard.
Then a couple hours later, my coworker tells our boss she took a test and is pregnant. She has only been married since June, and didnt start "trying" until the end of Sept. And after the first two months, she had the nerve to tell me she was afraid she was going to struggle like me. Hello, two months is NOT three years. So she had our boss tell me. And like an idiot, i busted out crying right in front of my boss. I was devastated. Dont get me wrong, Im glad she has been blessed, but (exxuse the language again) DAMN IT!!! When is **MY** turn?? Yessssss... ME ME ME ME ME!! I want it to be about me and MY miracle for once. I want what so many people have.....
If you havent heard it already, go listen to Kellie Coffey I would Die for that. My life's current theme song. Sorry for my rant, but here it is. And I could really use some advice. For instance, how do I handle working with her knowing my heart is crushed? I did send her a text that said I was happy for her, but hurt. She said she understands and not to give up. Easy for her to say, huh? It took three tries....
*Trying Tiff*
Oh hun I'm so sorry! I know how you feel right now, the EXACT same thing happened to me. I'd been ttc for 2 years and a co-worker also only tried for a couple months. She had a mutual friend co-worker tell me she was preg and I burst into tears!
ReplyDeleteIt's completely understandable that you feel upset and robbed by being "beaten" to your dream. I was exactly the same and actually tried to avoid being around the girl. It became so hard trying to steer clear though as everyone in the office was talking about HER pregnancy (we're all women in the office, no guys to hang about with at all).
I did have a quiet moment with her and explained how I felt and that it really wasn't her fault she managed to get there first, it's an irrational emotion to feel jealous of something like this and it's not your fault you feel this way either so don't beat yourself up about it.
I actually ended up getting more involved with her pregnancy and enjoyed talking about it with her. Don't get me wrong it took me ages to get to that point, but it was almost like a version of therapy.
When she was 17 weeks I found out I was expecting too, and I firmly put it down to the bonding time we had talking about babies. Unfortunately I lost the baby at 6 weeks but it made me more determined to keep trying because I knew it could happen for us. And I totally believe it will happen for you too!! Pregnancy spreads like wildfire in the workplace, you may find some other workmates coming out of the woodwork and saying they're pregnant too, but keep your chin up, I know it WILL happen for you! Stay positive and use your blog/twitter for an outlet if you need it. It's what we're here for! :)
Good luck and LOTS of baby dust! x
I'm sorry to hear about your rough day! I understand how you feel completely! It's hard at first but you'll get stronger from it. Just take it moment by moment and keep writing it out we're here for you :)
ReplyDeleteThat is a rough day. I know it’s difficult to work with someone who is PG but maybe, just maybe she'll be a bit considerate since she knows your situation.
ReplyDeleteThe best suggestion I have is to remember that you can walk away from a coversation that your uncomfortable with. You work with her, you do not have to hear her stories about how she feels or when she complains.
I hope your week improves (hugs)
THanks for the support ladies :)
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